Looking for versatile ways to increase intimacy with your partner? Try mutual masturbation! It is another way of having sex with your partner and comes with many perks. Intrigued? Read further to know more about mutual masturbation and tips on how to use it to spice up your sex life.
What Is Mutual Masturbation?
Mutual masturbation, also known as couple masturbation, can be of two types. One involves you and your partner masturbating in front of each other. You can do this in-person, on a phone call, or via video call. In the second type, you both have hand sex with each other. Here, instead of doing it yourself, you both help each other masturbate, you stimulate your partner, and they do the same for you.
How Does Mutual Masturbation Work in a Relationship?
The intimate activity of mutual masturbation does not just set the temperature soaring hot but is also a gateway for you and your partner to experiment with new things in bed. Dual masturbation brings out the exhibitionist and voyeuristic traits in you and your partner. What’s more, the feeling of watching your partner orgasm is tantalising and sensational.
Why Is Mutual Masturbation Magic?
Here are some other reasons why you should try mutual masturbation:
1. Reduces Tiredness
If you and your partner have full-time professional commitments, it is likely that you both may be too exhausted to be in the mood for sex. But if you both still want to engage in an intimate activity and achieve an orgasm, mutual masturbation is the best alternative.
2. Helps in Exploring Sex Life
Masturbation is a great way to figure out what someone likes or dislikes in bed. Mutual masturbation can help you, and your partner better understand each other’s preferences. This can give you ideas on how to ignite the fire of passion and improve your sex life.
3. Provides an Opportunity to Incorporate Sex Toys
Using sex toys for masturbation helps achieve more intense orgasms. However, sometimes people may not know how to use them on their partners. So, when you and your partner use the toys on yourself in front of each other to get an orgasm, you both can learn about the best ways to use the toys in the future.
4. Helpful When There Is No Condom
In case of situations when you both forget to get a condom or run out of it in the middle of the night, you can still indulge in sexual intimacy through mutual masturbation without any risk. Also, if you or your partner is currently being treated for STDs, you can safely get intimate.
How to Start and Set the Mood?
Here are a few tips for setting the mood for mutual masturbation:
- Choose a safe and comfortable place where you both can be yourself. It could be a couch, bed, bathtub: any place at which you both can explore the pleasure zones without inhibitions.
- Dim the light if one of you is feeling shy.
- Light a scented candle to create a more relaxed environment that will help you both be at ease and focus on each other.
- Keep a lube and sex toys handy just in case one of you wants to use them.
- Continue the conversation in between, ask your partner how they are feeling and if they are comfortable.
Also Read: Prone Masturbation: Is It Harmful? Plus Other Related FAQs
Best Mutual Masturbation Sex Positions
Some positions that you can try in mutual masturbation are listed below:
1. Side by Side
In this position, you both lie next to each other with their back on the bed and heads on the same side. It is considered the best position for those who want to stay connected and kiss their partner while masturbating. Both partners can use their mouths to kiss and explore each other's bodies and, at the same time, use their hands to masturbate themselves. However, visibility is an issue in this position. You might have to turn your head from time to time to see your partner.
2. Face To Face
This position is similar to the first one with the only difference that here, instead of lying on the back, both partners turn their faces towards each other. Many couples prefer the face-to-face position as it gives more visibility, and they get to kiss their partner simultaneously while masturbating.
3. Sixty Nine
In this position, both partners lie upon each other in a way that their sexual organs are toward the other person’s mouth. This is best for those couples who want to mix up oral pleasures with mutual masturbation. Both partners masturbate themselves and also give oral pleasure to another partner from time to time to help them reach climax.
It is similar to the sex position cowgirl, except here, instead of penetration, both partners masturbate themselves. In this position, both partners can see each other and use each other's bodies for mutual masturbation.
5. Reverse Cowgirl
This is a great position for those who want to experiment a little. It is similar to cowgirl, but the partner on the top sits on the other’s pelvis in a way that they are facing their legs. Reverse cowgirl is best for couples interested in anal play in mutual masturbation.
What if You Are Doing It on the Phone?
Check out these tips on how to get into mutual masturbation on the phone:
- Change into something sexy, imagining that you both will see each other.
- Get into the mood by sending flirty texts or nudes to each other.
- Initiate the call by asking them about the surroundings. Imagine yourself there lying next to them.
- Ask them what they are wearing and describe what you are wearing in detail.
- Describe how you are feeling while touching each other.
- Convey what you would like to do to them if you both were at the same place.
- Tell each other what turns you both on and try to incorporate them.
What if You Are Doing It on the Video?
Follow the below-given tips to have an amazing mutual masturbation session with your partner:
- In the case of video sex, your partner can see you, unlike doing it on the phone. So dress up accordingly. Wear something that would turn them on.
- Talk about your expectations, needs, and desires beforehand.
- If you want to try any roleplay or fantasy, it is better to discuss it in advance.
- Text them sexy messages and send pictures to build up the sexual tension.
- Organise the background that will be visible to your partner when you both will connect through a video call. You can light candles, put on nice curtains and so on.
- Talk dirty to each other the entire time. Make sure your partner knows what you are feeling.
Pro Tips to Make Mutual Masturbation Even Better!
1. Setting up the Place
The environment plays a very important role in mutual masturbation. You and your partner will only enjoy it if you both feel like you are in a safe zone and are comfortable with the setting. Keep the sex toys, lubes, and other such things you may need within reach. You can also set the right mood by putting on music, dimming the light, lighting scented candles, etc.
2. Experiment With Different Positions
You can make mutual masturbation more fun and exciting by trying out new positions. There are many options, such as side-by-side, standing, kneeling, and more. These will make the experience more enjoyable and also help you both in exploring each other's erogenous zones.
3. Mutual Masturbation as Foreplay or Final Act
You can masturbate in front of your partner as foreplay that leads to penetrative sex or use it for achieving orgasm. Just make sure that your partner is open to experimentation.
4. Do It Slowly
You might be masturbating quickly when you do it alone. However, take things slow while masturbating with your partner. The purpose is not to get an orgasm as soon as possible but that you both see each other masturbating and enjoy the act.
Myths and Doubts Regarding Mutual Masturbation
Here's a list of some of the common myths and misconceptions associated with mutual masturbation:
Myth: Only teenagers engage in mutual masturbation. Those who don't want to have sex opt for mutual masturbation.
This is not true. There's a misconception in society that penetration sex is the ultimate way of giving and getting pleasure. The purpose of sex is to achieve orgasm and have a pleasurable experience. It could happen even without penetrative sex. If someone can't have penetration sex or doesn't like it, they can perform mutual masturbation as an alternative.
Myth: Only same-sex couples go for mutual masturbation.
Also, not true! Anyone can opt for mutual masturbation with their partner, even heterosexual couples.
Myth: Masturbation is not good for health. It causes baldness, addiction, hairy palms, and erectile dysfunction.
These diseases have nothing to do with masturbation. They are caused due to several genetic and external factors which are not triggered through masturbation. It may have certain health benefits such as a confidence boost, more relaxed sleep, and stress reduction.
Mutual masturbation is a great way for you to give and receive pleasure from your partner. This intimate experience is a great way of getting to know your partner’s sexual likes, dislikes and needs. What’s more, you don’t have to be physically present to enjoy a couple masturbation with your partner. You can do it over the phone or a video call.
The best way to make dual masturbation an enjoyable experience for both you and your partner is to have an open conversation and ensure that they are comfortable with it.
- Mutual Masturbation - https://goaskalice.columbia.edu/answered-questions/mutual-masturbation
- Is Masturbation Healthy? - https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/sex-pleasure-and-sexual-dysfunction/masturbation/masturbation-healthy
- Is masturbation good for you? - https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/teens/sex/masturbation/masturbation-good-you
- Hairy palms and soles - https://rarediseases.info.nih.gov/diseases/8461/hairy-palms-and-soles